Waves of Emotion

So that tingling feeling of something going to happen, happened, as it were.

My boss instant messages me and tells me he set up a one on one with me the next day early in the morning and wants to make sure I can make it.

My brain immediately recoils in horror thinking that I’ve been caught using the interweb too much, or that fact that I’m at work for exactly 8 hours a day now, not a minute more.

I try to feel out the situation so I don’t spend the evening throwing up in anticipation.

I message back, sure no problem. Do I need to have some yearly goals put together to discuss or something like that?

He messages back, Well, I wanted to tell you in person… Oh shit … that your promotion went through.

Cooling calm and joy fill my heart. All my finishing reports on time has paid off. I tell him that’s awesome and thank him for working it on his end.

So I get 5%, and now I’m a Senior Gonzo Engineer. Maybe the Gonzo won’t be listed, but we all know the truth. I guess the grays in my beard are deserved now. It will look nice on a resume too, puts me in a different category and bargaining position.

This morning the kids don’t wake up at some point from 5-7. Seriously, the day I need to get in by 7:30 and they don’t make a sound. On top of that we find out my wife’s friend’s mom died this morning. I’m full of panic, self worth, and sadness. I need to get to this meeting so I get out the door buy 7:08. Luckily Peoria did a halfway decent job clearing the streets after 3 inches of snow.

I tear up a bit as I climb the hill to work. It’s a combination of relief of getting this promotion they’ve dangled in front of me for so long, and the loss my wife’s friend has to deal with. I remember her wedding and talking to her mom, this kind, lovely, gracious woman, nevermore. I try to pull my shit together and navigate the country road without killing myself.

I make it to work 5 minutes late, no big deal, everyone is 5 minutes late to every meeting they go to.

I sit down after the meeting, which is really nothing groundbreaking after finding out the high point the day before, and I am able to breath and let my head stop swimming.

Not Always a Linear Response

I learned some interesting things last night.

Both made things far more clear than they previously were. Then I slept on them and things became even clearer.

The one I’ll share is in regard to experience and performance. I read an article in Time about the subject. It was being brought up because of the presidential race. McCain’s huge amount of experience, Hillary’s made up experience, and Obama’s lack of experience (even though it’s on par with Lincoln, one of the best president’s ever).

This article was a general discussion of experience, what makes and expert, and does experience and expertise make for better performance.

The general rule is that it takes you ten years in a field to become an “expert” in that field. However, once you’ve become an expert, you need to continually challenge yourself in your field, or you’ll become stagnant and people with less experience will tend to perform as well or better than you. When presented with a problem that stretches the skill set and knowledge of a person in a field, they are generally on a level playing field regardless of experience level.

People who far outperform others in their field tend to always challenge themselves. They put themselves in uncomfortable situations rather than doing or practicing the things they are good at. They become frustrated, but get through it with a larger skill set.

This made me think of my adult hockey league carrier. I’ve been playing for about 4 years now. I’m no expert, but if I ever want to get better I can’t stay in C-League. It’s just stifling me. I need to be one of the worst players in B-League for a while to learn. I need to be uncomfortable for a while.

OK, I didn't like Panic! at the Disco, but I kind of dig this new song. I have a soft spot for poppy emo music. Must be because they dropped the !