We’ve fixed the glitch

Today was bizarre. Not over the top, monkeys riding bicycles held up a convenience store bizarre, just bizarre.

This morning I had to get my ass up at 7:00am even though it was a Saturday to go to a big discount baby item sale. It was an orgy of mothers desperately grabbing cloths and toys. As we were waiting in line, I looked back at all the hideous people and their kids, and it made me lose all faith that there is a God. I’ve said before that listening to David Bowie makes me believe in a God; apparently massive baby item sales have the opposite affect.

We returned home and I tried to take a nap on the couch while my wife and Carter slept. I had the original Batman movie playing softly in the background. In the haze before sleep, my fear of my own death popped into my head. I tried to ignore it, but I was already beginning to panic. So much so, that I jumped up from the couch (literally) and hopped around a couple times. I bent down to where Carter was sleeping in his basinet, gave him a kiss and smelled his hair. I laid back down on the couch and fell asleep.

When I woke up I had some errands to run, and my wife was going to a cloth diapering group. I got in my truck and headed down University. About ¼ to my destination I saw an old white hearse, and then about a block down I saw a dead raccoon on the side of the road. Not all that strange.

I’m 1/2 way to my destination, and I see the old white hearse about to turn onto the street I’m on. It would be physically impossible for it to be the same one I saw not 5 minutes earlier (he and I were going too fast in opposite directions for him to end up where he was when I was where I was), but it was exactly the same. It had to have been. Then about a block after I saw this white hearse, I saw another dead raccoon on the side of the road. There must have been a serious glitch in the matrix this afternoon, because that was some weird shit.