Pure Gonzo Engineering

Thursday, September 22, 2005

The Downward Spiral

Every great society has its downfall. Empires follow stages from inception to their eventual crumble. The Mayans, The Aztecs, The Romans, The Greeks, The Chinese Dynasties, all of them masters of their day. They don’t exist now though. Today, we are the Romans. America dominates the world. Our ideas, our language, and our commerce controls how the rest of the world goes about its daily business.

So what will be our downfall? In my opinion, it will be 24-hour news networks. Not just Fox news and it’s bullshit, but all 24 hour news networks. Last night prior to about 5:00pm Central Standard Time, all these assholes were talking about was the hurricane and how people were evacuating and how devastating it had the potential to be and blah blah blah blah blah lets fill more fucking airtime.

Suddenly, there was a new tragedy to focus on that was much more exciting. An airplane with its front landing gear turned 90°. Oh shit! It’s going to have to land in a few hours let’s focus on that now. Who wouldn’t want to be on the air when the Hindenburg goes up in flames? We may get to see a live plane crash. Then these dickheads start talking about how well trained the airline personnel are and what might happen if the strut breaks and blah blah blah blah lets fill more fucking airtime until this baby crashes and some people die.

Then when the masterfully skilled pilot was able to gracefully touch the aircraft down and slowly put the front landing gear in contact with the ground, you could hear the disappointment in the newscasters voice as the plane rolled to a stop, not on fire, all 140 people safe. What a bunch of bastards. 2 hours later it was back to the killer hurricane. What a bunch of dicks. Fuck all those 24 hour news douche bags. There’s my prediction, they’ll end up destroying us all.



  • Yeah, I was watching it as well. Pretty crazy shit. Apart from the smoke and flames and the fact that there was no rubber left on the wheel after it landed, that was a close to perfect landing.

    By Blogger Kevin W., at 10:48 AM, September 22, 2005  

  • Fly to LA sometime and watch some news casts. They all are like that. If it is about to drizzle they headline the news into a major theatrical production with "STORM WATCH 2005" and it just fucking drizzles man. Meanwhile its 80 degrees everywhere else in the state and it's FLASH FLOOD ADVISORY with a 1/4 inch of rain.

    By Blogger Steve, at 7:33 PM, September 22, 2005  

  • It was a bit melodramatic I agree. They even had that poor pilot from the Sioux City DC-10 crash years ago doing commentary on CNN.

    But it was better than a story that goes like this: "A JetBlue Airbus A310 with 139 passengers and 6 crew took off from Los Angeles this afternoon. It flew several hours and landed without incident at New York's JFK airport."

    I would tune in for the drama. Now you know why they jump all over stories like this because most of the time nothing interesting happens.

    By Blogger Chris, at 12:04 PM, September 24, 2005  

Post a Comment

<< Home