Stupid Internet Games

Steve from Steve's Blog “Tagged” me. Apparently this is some sort of internet fun thing people do where you list five random facts about yourself and then “Tag” some other people and it just keeps going.

I think internet-blog games are kind of gay, but I also thought blogging was stupid and gay when I started so I guess I’ll participate.


Fact #1: I went to Cuba for my honeymoon: No not really, but if I had gone I would have flown to Nassau first. It would have had a terrible international terminal, not the US terminal, but the other international terminal for all the other international destinations, I.E. Cuba. If I had gone, which I didn’t, I would have flown from Nassau to Cuba via Air Cubana on a piece of shit Russian plane known as a Yak . Right before take off, the plane would have started to spew out this whitish condensation-like smoke from under one of the seats. I would have thought that this was some sort of antiquated cabin pressurization system, but it still would have scared the hell out of me.

Upon arriving I would have found out that Cuba isn’t a hellhole, land of evil communists that I was taught up to point in my life. I would have also found out that everyone has a home in Cuba, not necessarily a good home, but no one sleeps on the streets, and no one goes without food, and no one goes without health care. Which, by the way, is the BEST of any Latin American country.

I would have spent a few days in Havana taking in the city culture and then I would have spent a few days in Veradero soaking up the sun on a white sand beach.

Then I would have flown home on via Nassau on a prop-plane flown by a dude who had a handle bar mustache who looked like a carny.

If I had gone, which I didn’t, I would have brought back some cigars, rum, T-shirts, and local art.

That’s what I would have done.

Fact #2: I won an invention competition at the University of Wisconsin Madison. I invented a new tattoo machine. I didn’t actually have a functional prototype, but I did get fourth place and $1000. You can read more about it Here and Here

Fact #3 I’ve seen Marilyn Manson live in concert 3 times: once in Madison, once in Milwaukee, and once at Ozz-fest in East Troy. He puts on a fucking awesome rock show. It’s one of the many reasons I’m going deaf at age 24.

Fact #4 I was a nerdy-geek in High School. I didn’t always have all these tattoos. I didn’t always mess people up in hockey, and wasn’t always a “Bad Mother Fucker” like my wallet states. (Seriously my wife bought me one, I’ll put a picture up some time). I was in marching band, and the science club. I wasn’t in any organized sports, got a 30 on my ACT (out of 36 most people get a 21, I think a 30 is two or three standard deviations from the average), played video games all the time, never drank, never had sex (close but not quite), and I think I ended up finishing in the top 1% of my high school graduating class of around 500.

Fact #5 My Arch enemies are the following people

Steve Stevenoski: My Senior Physics teacher at Lincoln High School. He was/is a fucking dick, and he cost me a full ride scholarship. He knows almost nothing about physics, and if he does he has no way of imparting this knoweledge to his students. On our first day he told us that he got a B in thermodynamics over the summer at UW-Stevens Point so he was going to make our lives terrible because he was pissed. I made sure to send him a copy of my transcript when I graduated UW-Madison and got an AB in Thermodynamics to let him know I was smarter than he was. Worst Teacher EVER.

Ray “Scout” Heyroth: It’s a long story of why I hate him and would knock-him-the-fuck out if I ever saw him again.

The management of Opposite of Dog: I just have a problem with authority and hypocrites.


Ummm I guess I'll tag: Chris Trost and Canine Crazy